I don't like the taste of my foot in my mouth...

You know that feeling when something bothers you? Not just a bothersome thing, but something that overtakes your body with emotion. You get so worked up and no matter what the circumstances or consequences are, THAT matter which you are so worked up over is the most important thing. Nothing else matters. Nothing you say will ever be regretted. You feel so much rage and passion for that one thing that you know you can say whatever you feel and be fine with it, one hour later, one day later, or one week later.

The only problem is. Whatever you do or say always matters. You are always racked with guilt and regret and this big matter you got so worked up about really doesn't matter too much. You just made a big deal out of nothing and an even bigger idiot of yourself.

Well. I know the feeling. Oh too well.

You see, I haven't taken the full blown color code test- but I have taken mini tests that correspond. My results tell me that I am a blue person. This means a lot of things, but one thing that is somewhat parallel to this post is blue personalities are very much emotion driven.

Oh this is SO me. I completely let my emotions overcome me. It can be terrible. Namely, in situations like the one listed above. I can't even control how I feel and I just know that I am right, no matter if I hurt someone or not.

Here's the thing. Hurting someone, never right. Someone you love, even more wrong.

So I'm setting a goal. To THINK before I FEEL. Not always, but mostly. So I avoid awkward and awful situations and I don't have to get myself out of any holes. Well, or just less holes.

The biggest problem is, I also have this slightly stubborn side. You could at times call me Stubborn Sally. So once I do commit these awful transgressions, I struggle with facing the consequences laid before me. That should probably be another goal, to be less stubborn.

Change is not easy. But sometimes necessary. The world sure as heck doesn't revolve around me. I am still alive. Still just fine. I just need some patience. Less stubbornness. And maybe more tact. Just for some prevention against nights like these.

It's probably better to not cry over things that don't matter in the first place and definitely not TWICE just because you made yourself cry for being dumb. I do this to myself. Oops.

So dear person who I accidentally became enraged at, I publicly (as public as this blog is) apologize to you. I know you know this blue attribute I have, so please forgive me for acting that way.

Try to remember I'm very much so, well, a human being.

Not an excuse, but still. I am working on it. And I'm very excited. REGARDLESS of anything else.

:) You know what I mean.

Fall Findings

I just love fall. Please come, please stay. No snow yet!

Fantastic Fall and Sunset Hikes

Dear Blog-reader(s),

I love this time of year. I want to go on many more as the leaves change and fall really sets in. This is a beautiful time of year! If school didn't consume my life, I would love it even more. But fall is still one of my favorite seasons for a few reasons.

1. The leaves. Of course. They are beautiful, so many colors! I love it. I don't know how I could really live somewhere that didn't have fall leaves. I enjoy them THAT much.

2. Sweaters, scarves and tights. I love dressing for fall. During the winter, anything you wear is covered by big winter coats (usually more than one, when you live in cache valley). But fall- ah! The air is crisp enough to start pulling out the sweaters and tights and scarves. I really enjoy these three clothing items. I wish I had more, but I definitely have enough. :)

3. Halloween. I LOVE holidays. The fall is the beginning of the Holiday Season, I would say. Halloween is SO fun! I love it. I love scary movies, carving pumpkins, haunted houses, halloween candy, mom's homemade chili, dressing up like you're dead or anything else and wearing black and orange in October- period. It is great! I am excited, but need costume ideas...

4. I've always enjoyed the changing leaves, the crisp fall air, the Halloween holiday festivities, the fall clothing, etc. But I love fall even more now that I live in Cache Valley. There is a certain feel to it, but it just seems perfect. Logan in the Fall. It's like, Paris in the Spring. Same ring to it. I am so glad I've got to be here the past 3 falls and I can't wait to spend many more here.

5. Last, but not least, are hikes in the Fall. It's the perfect temperature and I don't think nature ever looks as beautiful as it does during a season change. It's right before everything looks dead and it's as pretty as can be. The other night, Tyson and I went on a sunset hike along the Bonneville Shoreline up Logan Canyon. It was fairly easy and very pretty! You got a beautiful feel of the canyon, but a view of the valley as well. Here are a few pictures, because yes, I made us stop for like an hour and have a little photo-shoot. I love these pictures! I can't wait for our next fall hike. I'm sure there will be another post about it.

Happy Fall everyone! Enjoy it. :)

The end.

With love,

Katie

Fotos.

Two posts in one night, I know- this is impressive.

Here is the thing, my friends. I like to take pictures. A lot. I am trying to develop some skills and abilities to incorporate in with this love of mine. I have taken a few pictures for friends, but I would like to really start trying to build a portfolio. I know there are some things I should learn in a classroom format, but I also think one thing that will really help me is PRACTICE. Practice makes perfect.

So, if you know anyone or are someone who would want me to take your picture- I would love to. For Free Ninety Nine, I'll take your senior portraits, engagements, bridals, family portraits or just some fun pictures. It would help me SO much and I don't think I'm the worst photographer ever, just working on improving. I'll be posting some stuff I do on this blog so you can check it out before you decide.

Just so you know. A little 411. Thanks friends. Hope to photograph some of you! It would be great fun. :)

Alright Folks, Here is the Dealio.

I know, I know. I lied. All five people that read this blog can be upset over it and I am sorry. I know I said I was going to post stuff while I was gone, but seriously- the internet situation was crazy and I really only had time to email. Hopefully you got to read the couple emails I sent out, if not, I'll fill you in. Europe was incredible. I can't believe it's over and I'm back in Logan, starting my Junior year of college (I feel old).

Anyway, it was an amazing experience and I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to go and do something like that. I made some dear friends, some that I will be friends with for a long time I'm sure. I also learned SO much. I missed people very dearly. I got VERY homesick. I was lonely at times. BUT I saw incredible things. Ate some really great food. Experienced a few different cultures. Went completely out of my comfort zone. And rode on a lot of trains, ferries, airplanes, buses, metros, etc. It was an adventure. Every single day. I loved it though. I wouldn't take it back for anything. I laughed a lot too and that was important. It was definitely somewhere I was supposed to be at that time of my life and I'm glad I went.

Onto the new things...

I'm back at Utah State. I love it here. Cache Valley has become home to me. It's a beautiful valley with so much cool things! It's a lot of fun and I like being a student here. I've made some great friends, had a lot of fun and gotten a great education. I've been opened to a lot of new ideas and ways of life that have made me grateful for my own life and my family. I was raised in an incredible family! I am so grateful for them and their continuing love and support. They're the greatest! Being here has really confirmed where I need to be in my life. Right here. Mentally, emotionally, physically-- just altogether, right here.

Life is crazy. I know a few of my posts are just about how crazy it is and how I'm so blessed and happy, etc. etc. But I can't help it! It's the truth. I'm amazed every single day at the way things have turned out. Not what I expected at all. Oh and I'm SO glad about that.

Life is good. I AM happy. I AM incredibly blessed. I am who I am for a reason. Even though I get frustrated with myself, I wouldn't change who I am and what I've been through and learned for anything. It has shaped who I am and I wouldn't say I'm too shabby of a person. I'm happy. That is the important thing. How grateful I am for so many things. I could go on and on. Maybe when Thanksgiving rolls around, I will. But mostly just to be alive, where I am, what I am doing and who I am with in my life. It's all the best! I love it. I love life! I hope you do too. Everyone should. Nothing should stop you from rejoicing for being alive, because it's an amazing feeling.

:) The end. Life is good. I am happy. I am going to start being a good blogger. (maybe)!

Here's the Thing

Dear the few people who read my blog-

I am back. Yes, for reals this time. I know I've said that before, but this time it's a sure thing.

I am heading off to Rome and Athens for 6 weeks. I'll blog about my travels there and the things I see, hopefully with some pictures to show as well. So stay tuned for some awesomeness.

On the other hand, I just want to say how great life is! I am excited to see more of this beautiful earth. I know these experiences will be amazing and I'll document them to the best of my ability!

arrivederci!

She's Baaaaack.

Okay, okay. I am a horrible blogger. As well as a horrible journal writer. I ALWAYS want to update this and write in my journal and exercise.... but these things rarely get done. BUT they never will if I don't make the change, so I best be doing that. 

Not that anyone reads this anyway.... ha.

But I do have some updates, so I'll begin. 

1- I am not going to London anymore. I know you may be thinking, what in the world not?! But I am actually going somewhere that may be BETTER....

Rome and Athens.

I am so excited.

I am going with BYU for 5 weeks. To Rome, Florence and Athens. 

I am also going to be traveling with my sisters after to France, Switzerland and Germany (hopefully). It will be amazing! I know something that will teach me a lot about life, as well.

I leave in a little less than 2 months.

Right now I'm just living at home and working at Clyde Companies until I depart.

It is good to be around family again, but I do miss Logan! It is one of my favorite places and I am so glad it's where I have chosen to go to school! 

This is kind of like a journal entry and I want to steer away from that, but just a quick update to get me back into the Blog world. Here it is!

Chao, as they say in Italia! 

life is good. :)

LIFE is never what you expect it to be.

I think if it was, it would be too predictable and boring.

But since there is constant change, it makes things exciting. It also makes them extremely difficult sometimes, especially when you've got a good thing going on and it is forced to come to an end. Ugh, it can be rough times!

Although, something I have learned recently is there is always something better coming along.

I think that you must have HOPE, faith and love. These are key in living a truly happy life. 

I have been very blessed with another opportunity, aside from traveling to London. 

The Especially For Youth program would like to hire ME as a counselor this summer. 

I don't know the details of when and where yet, but I can already say that is is a blessing!

I am filled with so much excitement to do this! For those of you who really know me know how much of an EFY maniac I was. And still am! :) It will be a truly amazing experience. Hard, but so rewarding. I can already tell!

Things in my life definitely aren't where I thought they would be, or where I even wanted them to be a few months ago. But I realized something last night that is simply so great. I had to share:

I am happy. I am independently and truly happy. It has been such a long time since I've felt the way I do and it feels great. I never want it to end! I feel like things are falling in place and all the chaos that was going on in my brain and heart and life has come to a halt. I know it hasn't ended, because then life would get boring. Right? :) But I am grateful, to know the things I now know and to be truly happy through the good things of life.

I am also so so blessed with incredible family members and friends. I couldn't do anything without the people I love. They are always there for me, they keep me going and I love them dearly. 

 

PS sorry this is so long and kind of serious. I just had to share some thoughts! 

And seriously,

life is good. :)

London Calling

So I was going to make this post a few days ago, because I have some GREAT news.

I got accepted to a Study Abroad program with UVU to go to London this Spring! I leave May 11th and the semester ends during the end of June. I plan to stay a couple weeks after and travel around Europe. I am SO stoked slash excited slash happy that I get to do this! What a great opportunity. Once in a lifetime, for sure. I can't wait. 3 months, less than actually! It will be seriously SO great. Just had to share that exciting news with everyone. :)

Anxiously Waiting

Okay, so just this morning I had TWO very large and important interviews that will determine a lot about my future, mostly about this summer.
I had an interview to be an EFY Counselor and I had an interview to Study Abroad to Athens and Rome through BYU. I am going to have another Study Abroad interview to go to London with UVU, but that one is in a couple of weeks.
ANYWAY, this morning I went to both of my interviews and I think they went pretty well! I felt happy about them and SO relieved they were over. Seriously, interviews are the the worst things ever for me. I am a people person and I get along well with almost anyone I meet. BUT interviews are a whole different story. I get sweaty hands and tongue tied and almost never say the things I want to. BUT today, I felt pretty good about the things I said.
The only problem is, I've already checked my email 15 times today and I am probably not going to hear back for a few weeks....
Until then, I will be anxiously waiting. Very anxious. Like a 7 year old waiting to open their presents on Christmas morning.